Lindsay Lohan defends Trump, hopefully secures a cushy job in his administration

By Sam Barsanti  |  July 5, 2017 | 8:45pm
Aux Features Film

Earlier this year, Lindsay Lohan bonded with famous dummy Piers Morgan over their mutual affection for misjudged underdog Donald Trump, and now Lohan is once again trying to make sure that everyone knows just how loyal she is to the Great Orange One. As reported by Rolling Stone, Lohan responded to a tweet about some Breitbart bullshit by posting a message saying that everyone should “stop #bullying” Trump and “start trusting him.”

She then defended Trump’s entire family, saying that they “are kind people,” and she wondered why Americans would “speak poorly of anyone.”

As Rolling Stone helpfully points out, Donald Trump has also praised Lohan in the past, suggesting in an appearance on The Howard Stern Show once that Lohan must be “great in bed” because “she’s probably deeply troubled.” He also added that “you have to like freckles,” because he has seen a “close-up of her chest and a lot of freckles.” Trump clearly thinks very highly of her, then, so it’s easy to see why Lohan would to ingratiate herself with the Trump family, but there might be an added benefit here beyond getting in the good graces of some big assholes.

Lindsay Lohan’s movie career isn’t exactly at the same level as it was in her Mean Girls days, but Donald Trump has proven that he’s a big fan of giving important jobs to his friends, so maybe he could hook her up with a cabinet position of some kind. After all, the White House’s Office Of Science And Technology Policy has been virtually abandoned, and Lohan probably made a jokey cameo as a scientist in some bad movie, so at least she’d be more qualified for that job than everyone else in the Trump administration is for their jobs.

 
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