New The King's Man trailer demands we consider Rasputin's testicles
Rhys Ifans is playing the infamous Russian priest in the Ralph Fiennes-starring prequel
Look: We’re aware that the Kingsman series of films—which have now, inexplicably, expanded to include a prequel with none of the same people from the first two in it, set in the run-up to World War I—are not intended as historical documents. There is no secret quasi-government agency who wages war with murderous billionaires while dressed in dapper suits; Colin Firth can’t actually kick an entire church of hatemongers’ asses; Elton John is probably not nearly as chill as he seems. Even so: This new red band trailer for The King’s Man is one hell of a historical headache.
Fair credit where it’s due, though: Russian priest Rasputin was a noted hedonist with a love of food and fucking, so Rhys Ifans’ portrayal of him here isn’t all that far off. Beyond that, though, we have Ralph Fiennes, Gemma Arterton, and Djimon Hounsou attempting to stop the Great War, which: Spoiler alert, they probably won’t. (Also, looking over the film’s cast list, we notice that there’s someone showing up in the role of famed archduke assassinator Gavrilo Princip, which is just hilarious.)