Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Revolution is back, and it will not shut up about someone lighting the way

Illustration for article titled Revolution is back, and it will not shut up about someone lighting the way

Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Monday, March 25 All times are Eastern.

Revolution (NBC, 10 p.m.): When last we saw this show, it was November. Thanksgiving had just ended. Our bellies were still full of turkey. We had begun turning our eyes lazily toward the year-end holidays, contemplating just what we would do then. We had rolled our eyes a million times at this show’s “suddenly, the power went out!” premise, but the rest of America gobbled it up with a fork and straw. Now, it’s late March. We are older, more jaded. Les Chappell had stopped believing in the power of a pouty teenage girl. Not a one of us will ever forgive this show the “We still don’t know why the power went out, but we’re hoping someone will come along and light the way” nonsense either.


Adventure Time (Cartoon Network, 7:30 p.m.): Whoa. We’re going to go back 996 years, to see what Ice King and Marceline were up to, in a sorta-sequel to one of the show’s very best episodes. Oliver Sava was totally fine until he found this crown, but since then, he’s been acting strange. Should we worry?

The Carrie Diaries (The CW, 8 p.m.): “Carrie happily pretends to be Larissa, but it’s not as much fun as she anticipated,” reads the TV Guide summary, eliding over the horror inherent in the premise! Did Carrie kill Larissa? Does she have dissociative identity disorder? Carrie Raisler gets to the bottom of this.

How I Met Your Mother (CBS, 8 p.m.): Future versions of Ted and Barney turn up, while Marshall and Robin have a dance-off. How close is this to Lily having a magical alien friend only she can see or hear? Because Donna Bowman is very much excited to begin that chapter of the series’ lengthy history.

Regular Show (Cartoon Network, 8 p.m.): It’s been so long since this show was on that we’ve forgotten how to make jokes about the Bird Thing and the Raccoon Thing. Perhaps you can help fill us in? All Alasdair Wilkins hopes is that the show’s (relatively short, actually) absence made hearts grow fonder.

The Following (Fox, 9 p.m.): A fairly major character passed away last week, but we couldn’t stop laughing at the moment. Does this make us bad people? According to the people who think we should take this show seriously, it does! If you agree, sign their “David Sims is a ninny” petition post haste!


Bates Motel (A&E, 10 p.m.): Enough of you read about this last week that Todd VanDerWerff finally just shrugged his shoulders and said, “Might as well,” while his wife wept endlessly because he hasn’t even looked at her in months, and she hoped she could win him back from his terrible goddess television.

Top Of The Lake (Sundance, 10 p.m.): If you’re not watching this twisty, intricate miniseries from Jane Campion, well, we just don’t know what to tell you. It’s everything The Killing wanted to be and was not. It’s everything Scott Tobias has ever wanted from a miniseries set in New Zealand. Why are you waiting?


Peep Show (11 a.m.): One of this week’s episodes—starting the second season already!—is titled “Jeremy Makes It,” and we’re left to wonder, makes what exactly? Phil Dyess-Nugent has to assume it’s one of those things where he glues a bunch of macaroni to some construction paper and calls it art.


Batman: The Animated Series (1 p.m.): Holy shit, Etrigan the Demon is in this episode? We love Etrigan the Demon, almost as much as we love Detective Chimp! If DC could make its current Demon Knights series an Etrigan and Detective Chimp team-up, we’d talk about it with Oliver Sava on the phone.

The Voice (NBC, 8 p.m.): The judges’ panel is half new, so we’re checking the show out this week, sending in our loyal, reliable singing show expert, Caroline Framke, who will let you know whether swapping in Usher and Shakira for CeeLo and Christina ends up working or falling apart horribly.


180 Days: A Year Inside An American High School (PBS, 9 p.m.): We’ll take you inside an American high school, PBS. It’ll just be the jocks picking on the nerds, and the cheerleaders looking longingly at the jocks, and then somebody drives into the lunchroom in a souped-up Chevy, and it’s DANCE PARTY TIME!

Barabbas (Reelz, 9 p.m.): Reelz said, “Are you sure you want what’s likely to be a terrible new miniseries about Barabbas, or we could show you the complete works of Jean Renoir?” And the crowd called, “Give us Barabbas!” And that went on for a while, so Reelz finally just gave up and gave the crowd Barabbas.


My Evil Sister (Biography, 10 p.m.): Oh, look! Biography finally just made a show about What’s On Tonight’s life, like we’ve been clamoring for all these… Oh, hi, Stacy! What are you up to? Fancy seeing you here! We’re just writing What’s On… Why do you have a shovel? Why are you… Stacy, we’re…

Strange Lady In Town (TCM, 8 p.m.): This is another one of those TCM movies we’re picking, even though we’ve never seen it, just because we find the title so gosh-darn evocative. It’s apparently a Western, it stars Greer Garson, and if we had to guess, we’d say it was about a strange lady. In town.


Chernobyl Diaries (Cinemax, 10 p.m.): We thought this was a solid premise for a horror movie, but then it turned out to be not the best, according to reviews. We couldn’t force ourselves to see it. Let’s talk, instead, about how feral housecats are now one of the main predators in the Pripyat evacuation zone!

NCAA Women’s Basketball Tournament: Second-round action (ESPN2, 7 p.m.): If the last four days of college basketball haven’t led you to seek detox programs, then maybe it’s time for you to check out the women’s tournament over the next couple of days. It’s on ESPN2 all night tonight, so go and watch!


Vikings (Sunday): Why would anyone make Ragnar stand trial? That’s what we wanted to know, until we found out it was a character played by Gabriel Byrne. Then we just assumed that he would make Ragnar talk and talk until he uncovered a childhood trauma. Dennis Perkins’ trauma involves geese.