Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Smile! You're On The Reality Show Equivalent Of The Hindenburg

In order to fully appreciate the resounding awfulness of Fox Reality's "Punk'd meets Cops" catastrophe, Smile, You're Under Arrest, there are a few things you should fully understand:

First off, you're aware that if someone has a warrant out for their arrest–no matter what the circumstances or the alleged offense, that makes them a criminal, and it's our duty as responsible citizens to humiliate criminals, right? They deserve it. In fact, they practically asked for it by possibly doing whatever it is they may or may not have done. Once someone accuses you of a crime, you cease to be a person. That's called justice.


Secondly, you know that third-rate improv actors, the Fox network, and showboating local sheriffs are keepers of justice, right? That's why the third most popular name for college improv groups–right after The Groin Injurers, and ZanyTown–is Keepers Of Justice, and why you're allowed a trial by judge, jury, or Fox Reality. It's also why Maricopa County, the county in Arizona ruled by the iron fist and bright-lights ambitions of the star of Smile, You're Under Arrest, Sheriff Joe Arpaio, is 100% crime-free.

Finally, you like to laugh, right? Well, can you think of anything more hilarious than wasting time, money, and various law enforcement resources on setting up an elaborate, thoroughly dull prank in order to arrest a handful of non-violent alleged criminals and give a little more filler to Fox Reality's all-filler programming schedule? Humiliation + Unfounded Moral Superiority + The Keepers Of Justice™ + A complete waste of money and time = comedy, according to Fox Reality

Now you're ready to watch an episode of Smile, You're Under Arrest, the prank show built on a burning pyre of human souls.

Next episode: Operation Further Identify With The Criminals