How many times have you settled in to watch John Carpenter’s Escape From New York and thought to yourself, “this movie is pretty good, but I wish it didn’t have so much escaping from jail”? Well, you’re in luck, because according to The Wrap, Luther creator Neal Cross’ take on the 1981 cult classic won’t feature New York City as a maximum security prison, but rather as a “breathtakingly lovely” techno-utopia. Oh, and the film will begin in a city outside of the United States.
The Wrap exclusive also revealed “Snake” Plissken’s real name—Colonel Robert “Snake” Plissken—answering a question that has plagued viewers with no imagination for 35 years. Hopefully audiences can also discover that Plissken came from a broken home, leading to his life of crime (and loss of his eye.) Also of note is that Lee Van Cleef’s Bob Hauk will now be CIA Deputy Executive Director Roberta Hauk, and a CGI hurricane named Superstorm Ellery is headed for the city. Thankfully nobody will be attempting to recreate Issac Hayes as the A-number-one Duke Of New York; the villain this time out will be Thomas Newton, “the playboy heir to an agrochemical and biotech corporation.”
Snake’s new mission, whatever it may be (it’s doubtful anyone would want to save the current President-elect) will also need to be completed in 11 hours rather than 22. Presumably, everyone will still think Snake Plissken was dead. John Carpenter recently said of the upcoming Halloween reboot from Blumhouse:
I found myself bitching all these years about them making another one, so with this one I thought, well, maybe I can get in and help and make something I’m proud of instead of sitting at home grumbling.
John, the Halloween franchise can’t be saved. Do we have to inject you with micro-explosives so that you’ll save Escape From New York? Or maybe you could just remake Lock-Out as Escape From Earth?