Before watching the trailer for What Happens In Vegas, there are a few things you have to push to the back of your mind, lest your head overheat from processing all the incredibly annoying, wacktastic, gimmicky, implausible elements smashed into those terrible two and a half minutes:

1. All forms of logic.

2. The reasonable questions, "Why don't they just split the money?" And "They know that $1.5 million each is still a great deal of money, right?"

3. Your knowledge of the American judicial system which, though probably limited, includes the fact that a judge (even The Honorable Dennis Miller) wouldn't sentence two people to live out the plot of the world's worst romantic comedy.

4. Your sense of humor. (Unless your slapstick threshold is very high.)

5. The fact that accidentally sitting on a toilet with the seat up doesn't make a loud splashing noise, unless, of course, your toilet is a giant lake and you're doing a backwards cannonball into it.

Once all those things have been locked far out of your brain's reach, and/or you've undergone a voluntary lobotomy, it is safe to click play on the trailer below.

Ha ha ha! I get it, Ashton! It's not real: We're being P'Fict'n'd! This isn't a movie at all, it's just a string of terrible clichés, broad stabs at comedy, and the gimmickiest of romantic comedy gimmicks that you've thrown together as some kind of elaborate prank on the entertainment industry, right? Please?