Children no longer allowed to buy Pokémon cards at Target thanks to Wisconsin brawl

By Reid McCarter | May 13, 2021 | 4:00pm

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Children no longer allowed to buy Pokémon cards at Target thanks to Wisconsin brawl

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A group of dangerous Pikachu being escorted out to sea for summary execution and maritime burial. Photo: Tomohiro Ohsumi

Adult trading card speculators have gone and ruined Pokémon for the kids. Now that the franchise’s long-running card game has been embraced by investment-minded buyers (spurred on in part, we write with regret, by Logan Paul) who needed to find yet another dumb way to try to grow their bank accounts, the cards’ monetary value has spiked dramatically. This has led to situations where customers camp out overnight in long lines outside of retailers, competing with each other over who can buy the most of a product designed to be enjoyed primarily by children who like playing with pictures of cute monsters.

Now, as The Guardian reports, Target will no longer sell Pokémon cards because it doesn’t want people trying to kill each other over buying them at their stores. The retailer’s move follows a fight between five men in a Brookfield, Wisconsin Target parking lot last Friday. Rather than settle their card-buying dispute the proper way—by linking two Game Boys together so a fight between some kind of “pocket monsters” decides the winner—a 35-year-old man “pulled a gun” on the “four men aged 23-35" who assaulted him as he was exiting the store.