Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Here's Jeff Goldblum reading a bunch of horny tweets about Jeff Goldblum

Screenshot: Buzzfeed (https://twitter.com/BuzzFeed/status/973959152887353344)

The internet loves what it loves with a frightening intensity: cats, of course, and dogs, and other animals that are small and furry and prone to easily shareable quirks, but also celebrities who combine devastating good looks with the kind of effortless charm that inspires memorable videos and memes for days.

Jeff Goldblum, especially at this very specific moment in time, is the prime example of this. He engages with his most devoted fans; he is handsome; his very existence spawns GIFs and JPEGs like a severely pregnant salmon drops eggs. He is also, it goes without saying, the fulcrum for much of the internet’s oversexed id.

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In a video tweeted out by the obliging folks at Buzzfeed, Goldblum is made to confront the drooling shadow attached to his presence. Sat in front of a pink screen, he reads out and reacts to some of the horniest tweets (that can be spoken aloud) Buzzfeed was able to dredge out from social media’s aching psychic loins.

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He is, as you’d expect from such an unflappable guy, a very good sport about the whole thing. Reading about fans who would “let Jeff Goldblum murder me,” “pay millions of dollars to have jeff goldblum [sic] sit on my face,” or believe “the word daddy was made to be used on jeff goldblum and him alone [sic]” the man himself plays it extremely cool. He even treats viewers to a casual performance of the Jurassic Park scene in which he hits on Laura Dern through the avenue of explaining mathematical theories of all things.

“It’s a lovely thing to be appreciated in any way,” he says partway through the gauntlet of anonymous, laser-focused thirst aimed entirely at him. “Appreciated” is one way to put it.

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About the author

Reid McCarter

Contributor, The A.V. Club. Reid's a writer and editor who has appeared at GQ, Playboy, and Paste. He also co-created and writes for videogame sites Bullet Points Monthly and Digital Love Child.