As we have recently reminded everyone, Halloween Season officially began on September 17, and this year’s festivities certainly seem to be starting off strong. As reported over on Britain’s This Morning newscast before being bumped by our own personal stateside favorites at Coast to Coast, a new local resident of Liverpool made a charming discovery within his new home the other week when he stumbled across a wire poking out the bottom of one of his walls. After drilling a tiny hole nearby, Jonathan Lewis discovered a hellishly creepy rag doll stuffed within a “small cavity that had been hidden by plasterboard.”
What’s more, said doll came with a small “Welcome to the neighborhood” gift.
“My name is Emily. My original owners lived in this house in 1961,” begins a note attached to the doll, who goes on to confess “I didn’t like them so they had to go. All they did was sing and be merry. It was sickening. Stabbing was my choice of death for them, so I hope you have knives.”
“Emily” ended her welcome letter with a congenial, “Hope you sleep well,” because of course she did. While the revelation would have sent many running for the hills, Lewis sounds pretty unperturbed by the whole affair. Knowing that the house was only recently renovated around four or five years ago, he told newscasters that he suspects Emily the rag doll was placed there by someone as a longterm prank.
What’s more, Lewis has stated he intends to throw a Halloween party this year with Emily as the guest of honor... so, y’know, we’ll see how that goes when the inevitable Netflix documentary airs about that get-together’s mysterious, tragic conclusion in the next year or two.
Send Great Job, Internet tips to firstname.lastname@example.org