The Onion's Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile is now available online

After doing a brief theatrical tour, The Onion's very funny 20-minute send-up of true crime tropes is watchable online.

The Onion's Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile is now available online

Up until now, fans of both truth and crime were in a tough position when it came to watching The Onion‘s hard-hitting new 20-minute mockumentary Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile. Unless you could make it out to a handful of showings around the country, you simply had to take the word of critics—like our own film editor, Jacob Oller—that our former colleagues over at the Global Tetrahedron-owned satirical newspaper had managed to crack the true-crime format in an absurd, hilarious way. And isn’t that blind acceptance of what you’re being told exactly what Epstein’s old employers in the Deep State mailroom would want?

No more, though: This afternoon The Onion posted Bad Pedophile to its YouTube page, presenting it in all the docu-narrative glory that credited executive producers Harvey Weinstein, Woody Allen, and Roman Polanski would have wanted. (Shout-out, meanwhile, to whichever writer got Stunt Coordinator: Larry Nassar into the credits, too. That’s a very deep convicted sex offender pull.) Now we can all revel in the very silly, very dark send-up of true-crime tropes, which is happy to remind us that Epstein grew up as “your typical, all-American molester,” before things inevitably took a turn for the worse.

You can read our write-up of Bad Pedophile right here, but honestly, this one feels like a no-brainer: You’ve got 20 minutes, you like laughing at how fucked the planet is, you like being put on government watch lists for people who still enjoy satire in 2025. You know what to do.

 

 
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