The broken-foot-light parade that is Julie Taymor’s Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark musical has been delayed once again, with the opening date being moved from January 11 to February 7 so producers can tweak a few minor details, such as ensuring that the show’s Saw-like contraption of wires and harnesses keep decapitations to a minimum and also rewriting the entire second act. There’s also the “unforeseeable setback” of the recent injury of lead actress Natalie Mendoza (who plays the giant singing spider Arachne), who sustained a concussion during the show’s already-legendary first preview performance, when she was struck in the head by a rope holding a piece of equipment—a setback that certainly no one could foresee, unless you’d been following the news. Anyway, the delay—and a scheduled 72 more preview performances, making for an all-time Broadway record—will give producers time to work out newer, better ways to maim the acting world, rewrite the dialogue, potentially add new music from Bono and The Edge, and also draft a new final number. We suggest one called, “Run For Your Lives!”
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