TikTok is reportedly making a U.S. version of its app

Despite technically being banned since January, TikTok continues to torso dance its way across the United Smartphones of America. Now, in its third Trump-enabled extension, TikTok is reportedly planning to release a U.S. version of its app, if The Information‘s anonymous sources are to be believed. A U.S. version of TikTok is one of the requirements for the social network to continue offering Americans a space to discover which of Costco’s products elicits more booms, the Chicken Bake or the Double Chocolate Chunk Cookie. The news comes a week after President Trump stated that a group of “very wealthy people” is looking to acquire the app, but he will not reveal their identities for another week. Our carnie government in action, folks. Current owners, ByteDance, would retain a minority stake in Trump’s future propaganda firehose, satisfying Congress’ Protecting Americans From Foreign Adversary Controlled Applications Act. Phew. For a moment, we were concerned that social media apps were sharing users’ web activities with adversarial governments, but it’s only foreign adversarial governments. Meanwhile, per The Verge, the U.S. version is expected to hit app stores on September 5th, pending the sale’s completion. Trump has already extended the deadline three times, but The Information‘s sources believe that the original app will be removed from the App Store when the new one is ready. The old TikTok, they say, will cease functioning in March 2026.