Our first fleeting glimpse of Jersey Shore’s third season was but a quickie in the nightclub bathroom, an instantly regrettable bit of instant gratification that left you feeling sticky and unsatisfied. This new extended trailer delves deeper into our generation’s Divine Comedy, skipping past the lameass virtuous pagans and diving straight into the Inferno’s Second Circle reserved for the sin of lust (new roommate Deena, described as a “short little meatball, exactly like Snooki,” is seen “totally getting butt-naked” for The Situation), down into the depths of gluttony (a besotted Snooki faceplants on the beach, only to be hauled off by the police), onward toward the Fifth Circle of anger (“You are a fucking slutty-ass bitch,” Snooki says to Sammi, whose sole positive attributes it would actually be shorter to name) and straight on into the Seventh Circle of violence, with Sammi punching Ronnie in the face and then enjoying swift karmic retribution as seemingly every girl in the house takes a swing at her, until she’s forced at last to charter a car and seek asylum in some far-flung crusty sadness blanket yet to be determined.