From My Inbox:

Subject: The Super Cute Brooke Hogan!

Brooke Hogan, the ubercute and talented young daughter of wrestling legend Hulk Hogan, is ready to step into the arena of pop stardom. She's making her move from reality TV hottie to chart-topping diva with her debut album, Undiscovered!

Of course. "Super Cute." No two words better describe a girl standing nearly naked in some kind of 1980s red parking garage version of the dark underworld.

Still, OMG! Reading this first paragraph is like walking into a Sanrio store filled with the entire cast of

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Laguna Beach (seasons 1, 2, and 3). The level of excitment in that short paragraph is so high that one of two things must be true: either a.) this press release was written by Brooke Hogan's 14-year-old cousin, or b.) someone's being sarcastic. Also, which is a bigger accolade "Super Cute" or "ubercute"? Normally, I would think "uber," but the capitalization of "Super Cute" is throwing me off.

"This is my life, these are my song, this is my time, and I'm ready," says the rising star, whose refreshing blend of R&B;, hip-hop, and infectious pop make her debut disc one of the year's most highly anticipated new releases from Storch Music Company (SMC).

It's refreshingly infectious! But what kinds of topics will young Brooke cover in Undiscovered?

The first single "About Us" (featuring Paul Wall) is a sly and knowing comeback about the perils of living in the spotlight and dealing with false media rumors. I've also got mp3s of "About Us" and "Up In My Bizness" and an E-Card! I'll be getting CDs for review and contests, so as usual contact me ASAP if you are interested! (and yes, I'M INTERESTED)!!!

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(For video of Brooke's sly and knowing take on topics like dance-offs and grills go here.) Wow. I think we've just witnessed a nervous breakdown via press release. Really, it was bound to happen sooner or later. The weight of those exclamation points can be crushing. Also, no one has ever been that excited about e-cards. (Not even these e-cards, and they're widely regarded as the best.)