Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Thursday, June 14. All times are Eastern.

Burn Notice/Suits (USA, 9 and 10 p.m.):
To promote its regular slate of breezy actioners and slight-but-filled-with-attractive-faces workplace dramas, USA sent out a batch of similarly insubstantial treats: Yellow-frosted cake pops, each bearing the logotype of a USA summer series. The Burn Notice pop received in The A.V. Club offices was dispiritingly vanilla—sorry if that lowers your expectations for the spy caper’s new season, Scott Von Doviak—while the Suits dessert tasted not unlike the self-satisfied feeling of smirking your way into a job at a top New York law firm. Carrie Raisler looks into the show-dessert correlation.


Eagleheart (Cartoon Network, midnight): Thankfully, Adult Swim hasn’t attempted conveying this series through pastry. Given the “king of the tramps” that goes missing in tonight’s installment, that would be one rank, messy dessert—one which Kevin McFarland would decline, though he’d do so incredibly politely.

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (11 a.m.): The Maquis are still running amok in the first half of this week’s DS9 doubleheader—but the second half is titled “The Wire,” so we can only assume it deals with the crumbling moral, social, and political infrastructure that led to the Maquis’ creation. “Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit,” replies Sen. Zack Handlen.


The Thick Of It (1 p.m.): No mourning for the first series of The Thick Of It—stiff upper lip and all that. On to the second series, where David Sims steps into trying times for the Department of Social Affairs. Perhaps the problem is that its affairs are too social (wink wink)?

TV Roundtable (3 p.m.): Young Ron Howard learns about parenthood and the frailty of life, concepts he’d later revisit in directorial efforts like Parenthood and, er, Backdraft (?). Either way, this episode is guaranteed to move even the most steely members of our roundtable to tears. 

It’s Me Or The Dog (Animal Planet, 8 p.m.):
The ultimatum in this show’s title implies a potential for episode-by-episode variance, but given that it airs on Animal Planet, we’re guessing the “me” usually goes before the dog. Can dog trainer Victoria Stilwell prevent either from happening?


The Wanted Live From The Beacon Theatre (Fuse, 8 p.m.): The new wave of British boy bands gets its answer to New Kids On The Block’s Hangin’ Tough VHS tour documentary, filmed at the site of that Martin Scorsese-directed Rolling Stones concert film from 2008. So, you know, no pressure to live up to there, young chaps.

41 (HBO, 9 p.m.): Filmmaker Jeffrey Roth shines a thousand points of light on the life of President George H.W. Bush, a private figure subjecting to a rare personal profile here. Will there be a sequel? “Not gonna do it,” Dana Carvey’s impression of Bush says. “Wouldn’t be prudent.”

Final Offer (Discovery, 10 p.m.): The recent spate of reality shows inspired by Pawn Stars and Storage Wars has yet to best Antiques Roadshow in terms of cutting out the middle man to reveal the prices of rare/not-so-rare items in a matter of minutes. Final Offer nearly does so, while also setting the action in the reality-show equivalent of the Game Of Death pagoda.


The Other F Word (Showtime, 9 p.m.): No, it’s not “fuck,” “fist,” or “flea”—though Red Hot Chili Peppers bassist Michael “Flea” Balzary is interviewed—but rather “fatherhood,” in particular the brand of fatherhood practiced by aging punks like this documentary’s main subject, Pennywise frontman Jim Lindberg.

Cocktail (Cinemax, 8:15 p.m.): If there’s any entity rending its spandex garments in anguished anticipation for Rock Of Ages, it’s apparently Cinemax, which serves up “Top Gun in a bar” as part of a night-long Tom Cruise retrospective. Any chance a Cruise-led version of “Kokomo” made it into the final cut of Rock Of Ages?

NBA Finals: Game 2: Heat at Thunder (ABC, 9 p.m.): If the NBA Finals have to be the only sport of note on your standard cable package—suddenly, people paying for the MLB Network don’t look so foolish—at least it’s an NBA Finals where Oklahoma City is up 1-0 on Miami.


The Dream Team:
20 years ago, the greatest players (and some of the biggest egos) in the NBA teamed up to destroy all challengers at the 1992 Summer Olympics. One-man medal ceremony Marcus Gilmer doles out the gold, silver, and bronze for this documentary on the team’s origins and its historic run in Barcelona.