Guy orders pad thai so spicy the receipt promises to make him regret being born

There are two types of people in the world: Those who like spicy food, and those for whom “jalapeno” is a four-letter word. Logan Doan of Jacksonville, Florida is one of the former, and found himself faced with a considerable challenge by a vendor at the Hawkers Asian Street Fare when he ordered his pad thai “extra spicy.”

He clarified in an interview with the Kansas City Star, however, that that’s not quite how he phrased it. “As a white guy, I always ask for ‘Thai hot,’ but I feel like the server doesn’t take this seriously, and they have the kitchen tone down the heat in fear that it will be too hot and I’ll send it back. I’ll often ask for them to tell the chef it’s not for a white guy, but I don’t think they do this.”

This time, however, they did. His receipt served as proof—the word “Spicy” was printed on it 17 times and at the bottom some ominous text read, “MAKE HIM REGRET BEING BORN.” Battles lines had clearly been drawn.

Doan posted the receipt on Reddit, and it quickly went viral.

As Man Vs. Food host Adam Richman recalled in a recent episode of Hot Ones, that very same attitude nearly killed him. So, considering that, Doan’s fearlessness and subsequent lack of heat-induced hallucinations means we might as well give the dude his own show.

“Some folks in my office thought I was crazy for eating it, but I didn’t really get a rush from it,” he said. “I often push myself to the limit, and this dish wasn’t as spicy as some of the stuff I’m typically used to.”

Someone get this guy his chili boots.

[via Munchies]