Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Evidence That Billy Bob Thornton Is A Legitimate Musician

Illustration for article titled Evidence That Billy Bob Thornton Is A Legitimate Musician

Evidence that Billy Bob Thornton is a legitimate musician (as outlined in this article in the Toronto Star about his band's performance last night):

1. Like any young, largely unknown band opening for Willie Nelson, Billy Bob Thornton kicks off his 3-song set by talking about how famous he is:

After commenting on the beautiful theatre and the legendary performer they were opening for (Willie Nelson), Thornton said, "It seems as if when I say something it's in the news."


What young band can't relate to that?

2. For Billy Bob Thornton, as for all legitimate musicians, it's all about the music—and instructing reporters not to talk about your very successful acting career that is the entire reason they're interviewing your band in the first place:

When that drew boos, Thornton continued: "Boo all you want, but I want to say something…. We're really happy to be here, but I need to say something. I talked to this a—hole yesterday.

"I sat down and talked with this guy. He and his producers say, `We promise you we won't say that' (meaning references to Thornton's acting career). The very first thing they said was that."

3. Billy Bob Thornton hates sensationalism. Also, apparently he doesn't understand what sensationalism means. And like all bands that are just starting out, Billy Bob Thornton has a sense of entitlement that's been grotesquely inflated through years of celebrity:

"I don't really like sensationalism," he added. "If you look someone in the eyes and promise them something, and you don't do it, you don't get the interview. That's the way it goes."

The explanation was met by further boos and catcalls of, "Here comes the gravy," a reference to Thornton's description of Canadian audiences as "mashed potatoes with no gravy" during his interview with Ghomeshi.

When the crowd turned on him, I bet Thornton was muttering, "Would you boo Tom Petty?"; under his breath—just as all legitimate musicians who don't carry around Oscar-sized chips on their shoulders would.

4. Like all legitimate musicians who have never had acting careers, Billy Bob prepares for a gig by doing a few backstage interviews with local reporters, chain-smoking, and slathering on more foundation than Eva Longoria:

Before the show, Thornton told a Star reporter that he "loves Canada." When asked what he meant by the mashed potatoes comment, Thornton, wearing a thick layer of skin-tone facial makeup and sucking on a cigarette, said: "I was talking about the guy who was interviewing me."


Me-ow, Toronto Star. There's the gravy. Would you write about Tom Petty's heavy make-up? Would you? Billy Bob wants to know.