It was always going to come down to Allison and Patty, wasn’t it? Kevin Can F**K Himself has been about Mrs. McRoberts’ attempts to escape her toxic husband. Along the way, she finds a (platonic?) soulmate in her neighbor of a decade. Their friendship takes centerstage because both women finally find a companion who understands and accepts the other as they are, warts and all. It’s no surprise then that Allison finally does escape Worcester, despite not wanting to, because she believes it will save Patty. It also hits Allison hard that Neil and Tammy (for the second time) urge her to stay away from Patty because she’s the instigator who gets her pal involved in various messes.
While technically true that Patty goes along with Allison’s unhinged ideas—a murder attempt, stealing drugs, breaking into city hall, to name a few—she didn’t do it out of force. Much like Allison, Patty also found a BFF she didn’t know she needed. Their relationship has undoubtedly emerged as the most heartfelt part of KCFH, thanks to Annie Murphy and Mary Hollis Inboden’s sharp performances and palpable chemistry. Look no further than the scene where Allison confesses she doesn’t want to leave, and Patty immediately jumps in to agree that she shouldn’t. Of course, they don’t want to let go of each other just yet. They have to make up for years of missed connections and hopefully spend time doing non-criminal activities together.
Allison knows she can start fresh, but she doesn’t want to give up on the non-Kevin aspects of her life. Unfortunately, there’s no choice. Tammy has inched dangerously close to figuring out that Allison and Patty got the Oxy from Vermont and possibly paid Nick to break into the McRoberts’ home. And she simply won’t give up looking into it (as is her job), so Allison decides to exit town by faking her death as previously intended. The blame for everything Tammy’s investigating can fall on her alone. What can be done if Allison dies during a hiking mishap? I bet it won’t be that simple, though.
Regardless, Allison hastily departs town (I’m guessing because we sadly don’t see her actually leave, which was a bummer) after telling Patty she’ll “fix it.” Cue a sitcom scene where cops knock on Kevin’s door to inform him his wife was in an accident, while Allison poses as Gertrude Fronch to a real estate agent, quietly excited to get a whole night’s sleep now that she’s away from Kevin. It’s a bit jarring, but KCFH has plucked her out of a nightmare into the scenario she’s always wanted. It might not be ideal (there’s no Patty, Sam, or Diane), but Allison is somewhat at peace. Her BFF, meanwhile, is not. All she received was a note from Allison that says, “I’m sorry, you’re better off.”
Will this lead to Patty and Neil getting closer again? He spends the entire hour getting wasted, struggling to get Patty un-banned from the ice-skating rink. Allison tries to help him, but they get into a fighting match. It’s impossible not to feel bad for Neil here. He’s having a meltdown, a breakup, and an identity crisis simultaneously. He keeps daydreaming about his attack on Allison, followed by his own sister clubbing him in the head. No one believes him when he talks about Allison’s murderous plans because he’s always drunk, and he has nowhere to turn, so he keeps going back to the bar or Kevin. With Allison gone, maybe he and Patty can start to repair their bond. (Shout out to Alex Bonifer for a stellar turn; he transforms Neil from a total doofus in season one to a sympathetic, lonely figure in season two like a champ).
I know, I know. I spent all this time unpacking Allison and Patty’s relationship when “The Problem” tells another story that fleshes Allison’s personality some more. She follows through on her plan from last week to get Kevin to do her dirty work, manipulating him into seeking revenge on Tammy by saying she’s doggedly pursuing the arsonist who caused the blackout. Allison’s aware her husband is capable of getting Tammy fired; she’s depending on these dark qualities. While Allison mercifully doesn’t help him achieve this goal, her conversation with Sam about all of it was enlightening.
Sam is on team Allison now, but even he’s rightfully weary of her drastic step against Tammy. “I’m not sure you get moral high ground here because you’re about to ruin another woman,” he tells her after she complains about Kevin. (I scribbled “Good for you for calling her out, Sam” in my notes right then). “Maybe she was asking for it,” Allison retorts. Girl, what? After everything you’ve endured, that cannot be your excuse for bringing down someone else. Even if Allison disapproves of Tammy possessively getting between her and Patty, destroying her career using information Tammy shared with her in confidence (about planting evidence for her ex-partner) is in poor taste.
It’s eyebrow-raising, but it’s KCFH’s successful attempt at painting a picture of Allison as a flawed human being. She’s a victim with a warped worldview. She’s been wronged so much that she thinks it’s alright for her to now be rebellious, even if it hurts another person. It’s not right, it’s not fair, but after a life of abandonment issues (from her parents) and a torturous relationship, it’s easy to see why she’s desperate to hold onto the good she’s found. I’m glad the writing doesn’t take her down a dreadful hole she couldn’t claw out of. Instead, Allison ends “The Problem” as far away from Worcester as possible, but it’s only a matter of time till she’ll be back home, right?
- Oh, yeah, Pete is frustrated with his son over how he mistreats his girlfriend. He was surely about to announce he was moving out with Lorraine (not Doris, as I falsely assumed last week) just as the cops came to inform them of Allison’s “accident.”
- Kevin continues to say the stupidest things: “There is a reason drinking rhymes with thinking. And I do both well.”
- In case you were wondering, the fire that caused the blackout was the third blaze Kevin has set in his entire life.
- Here’s how Tammy describes the traits of an arsonist, therefore Kevin: “Low intelligence, completely socially inadequate, a real loser.” She ain’t wrong.
- Who else noticed that the mug Diane offers Allison a drink in has Chuck written all over it, in a red font that reminds me of Chucky?
- I adored Patty’s coat when she hops on over to Diane’s liquor store to inform her that Neil is alive and well. It’s giving Taylor Swift in the evermore album cover.
- I appreciate that no one, not even Patty, gives Diane shit for hooking up with Neil. Here’s a heavy conversation between them I loved:
Patty: “You love Neil?”
Diane: “Maybe I just don’t want to be alone. Maybe they’re not two different things.”
- With only one episode to go, what’s everyone predicting will happen in the finale? How long will Allison remain Gertrude before returning to her hometown, and what will she find when she’s back?