Happy Endings wishes you and yours a Happy Jane-mas

By Erik Adams  |  December 18, 2012 | 6:00am
TV Features TV

Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Tuesday, December 18. All times are Eastern.

Happy Endings (ABC, 9 p.m.): As if Jane needed any help feeling superior to everyone around her: Turns out she was born on Christmas. This is, however, the one thing that takes a ding out of her Teflon self-esteem, and when the Happy Endings gang finds out Jane shares a birthday with Jesus, they opt to give ol’ JC and his buddy Santa the heave-ho-ho-ho and devote the entire day to their favorite Type A. David Sims couldn’t decide on a present because he’s deathly afraid of Eliza Coupe’s disappointed glare.

REGULAR COVERAGE

Don’t Trust The B—— In Apartment 23 (ABC, 9:30 p.m.): or, “How The Chloe Stole Christmas,” by dragging her friends to the Hamptons out of a burning desire to bed guest star Nick Thune. And what happened next? Well Emily Guendelsberger says Thune’s fanbase didn’t grow three sizes that day, but it did pick up new members.

Vegas (CBS, 10 p.m.): The title of tonight’s episode, “Estinto,” comes for the Italian word for extinct. You know, like the rugged cowboy archetype represented by Dennis Quaid’s Ralph Lamb or Phil Dyess-Nugent’s interest in Ralph’s folksy philosophizin’.

TV CLUB CLASSIC

Arrested Development (11 a.m.): Now that Netflix did the work that the Home Builders Organization and a little bit of show time wouldn’t, Noel Murray takes a wistful look back at “S.O.B.s,” an episode of Arrested Development from a time when all the extra footage in the world couldn’t guarantee more episodes of the show.

WHAT ELSE IS ON

A Charlie Brown Christmas (ABC, 8 p.m.): If you’ve never seen the greatest Christmas special ever made, you really have no excuse: It’s been rerun for nearly 50 years, and since ABC bought the rights to A Charlie Brown Christmas, it’s aired the thing multiple times each December. Don’t be a blockhead—just watch it already.

The Voice (NBC, 8 p.m.): America turned its spinning chairs around for three legitimately deserving voices, but only one can be The Voice. But let’s be honest: We were pulling for blue-eyed soul beardo Nicholas David from the very start. If he doesn’t win tonight, look for Nicholas to host his own spin-off, The Facial Hair, next season.

First Freedom: The Fight For Religious Liberty (PBS, 8 p.m.): The latest volley in the War on Christmas comes from… The Founding Fathers? Don’t tell the Christmas Warriors at Fox News—not that any of them would watch a publicly funded documentary on the essential reasoning behind the separation of church, anyway.

Livin’ For The Apocalypse (Discovery Health And Fitness, 8 p.m.): After Raising Hope made the obvious connection between deeply discounted hoarding and Doomsday preparation last week, What’s On Tonight? is glad to see a pair of new Extreme Couponing episodes preceded by this bit of Mayan Apocalypseploitation. Come December 21, however, it’s Discovery Health And Fitness’ primetime stars who’ll have the last laugh—or the deepest regrets (and reserves of pudding cups).

Home Alone (ABC Family, 8 p.m.): John Hughes and Christopher Columbus reinforce the holiday spirit with a gruesome cavalcade of slapstick. Though, when you look at it a certain way, Macaulay Culkin’s improvised torture devices merely teach him to appreciate his family.

In The Good Old Summertime (TCM, 8 p.m.): The network presents a night of nearly holiday musicals starring Judy Garland, preceding Meet Me In St. Louis (the film that gave the world “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas”) with this Shop Around The Corner adaptation where Garland sings the similarly melancholic seasonal standard “Merry Christmas.”

College Basketball: Michigan State at Bowling Green (ESPN U, 7 p.m.): The 19th-ranked Spartans head to Ohio for a non-conference matchup/between-semesters gimme against the 5-4 Falcons.

IN CASE YOU MISSED IT

2 Broke Girls: With “And The High Holidays,” Pilot Viruet puts the adventures of Max and Caroline down for a long winter’s nap—a nap that will last beyond the winter, because, much to Pilot’s relief, this is the final regular A.V. Club review of 2 Broke Girls.

 
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