The finale of the 17th season of It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia does something subversively funny: While spoofing ABC’s The Golden Bachelor, it stages a reunion that would appeal most to the age demo of actual contestants from the show. For those of us old enough to remember classic comedies, seeing Danny DeVito and Carol Kane together again on TV allows for flashbacks to the wonderful Taxi, in which the two first appeared together way back in 1980. Apparently, the Taxi crew has stayed in touch in the four-decades-plus since that appearance, even assembling via Zoom during COVID, and Kane told People she was still “very close” with DeVito. It’s tempting to ask what took so long to get these legends back together on Sunny, but it works so well here that it feels worth the wait. Somehow their friendship comes through in the show, sliding back into the comic chemistry they honed so many years ago.
Kane plays Samantha, a contestant on The Golden Bachelor, starring Frank Reynolds. Last week’s “The Gang Gets Ready For Primetime” saw the Paddy’s crew miserably preparing for the hometown dates that would bring Jesse Palmer and ABC cameras to Philly, only to discover that Frank hired actors to play his family instead.
“The Golden Bachelor Live” opens with a very-game Palmer commenting on how Frank Reynolds may have been more “eccentric” than any previous contestant in Bachelor history but that he “won our hearts.” How did he pull that off? With amazing bon mots like “I can’t wait to find a grade-A prime cut piece of ass…to love.”
Cut to the classic Bachelor premiere sequence of arrivals at the mansion, for which Frank “dropped a couple bluies” to make sure he’s ready. Of course, horndog Frank misunderstood the concept of the dating show, presuming he wouldn’t have to date sexagenarians. He passes on Lisa (67), Kathryn (62), and Judy (69) before they can even say a word, uttering some crude material about crackling body parts that would never make it on ABC. Perpetually horny Frank threatens to leave if the producers don’t contact TikTok superstar Cock Chewa (Audrey Corsa) to be the one who gets his rose and his current STDs. Her catchphrase? “Chew on that thang,” followed by a sound that can only be called upsetting given the context of, well, that thang.
The Hawk Tuah riff gets a little tired, but writers Charlie Day and Rob Mac counter that influencer comedy with the wonderful Carol Kane, who joins The Golden Bachelor as Sam, a 65-year-old who sees through Frank’s shit. The comic chemistry between DeVito and Kane is instant, bringing out a side of Frank that we don’t normally see while also staying true to the character’s gross personality. Frank doesn’t fall instantly for Sam, but it’s the moments between them—the dinner date, Sam’s confession about her name, the closing scene—that are the best in this episode by far (and some of the best of the season).
Of course, there’s a ton of goofy shit in between the Taxi flashbacks. From Frank trying to do a promo spot for Prime Video to Cock Chewa making faces on a livestream in response to emojis left by fans, “The Golden Bachelor Live” is well-paced, cramming as many jokes as possible into its runtime.
After doing an OnlyFans livestream with Cock Chewa and having an awkward date with Sam, it’s time for the real hometown dates. It’s a good idea to get the rest of the ensemble into the season finale instead of stranding Frank on a spoof of a show that a lot of Sunny fans have probably never seen. Proving that the focus groups from last week did almost nothing, the Paddy’s Gang is hysterically awkward, especially Charlie, who gets my favorite line of the episode: “I too am feeling things!”
The quartet splits as Dennis and Dee interrogate Sam and Charlie and Mac go to work on the viral sex star. The siblings don’t want anyone to get their inheritance; Charlie just doesn’t want someone else sleeping on his couch. It’s funny to note again, 17 seasons in, how terrified these people are of change. Whenever anything, even a potentially positive one, threatens their stasis, they freak out and destroy it. What’s also been consistent is that Frank usually skates through their screwups, finding his own forms of happiness. He may look for get-rich-quick schemes or love on national TV, but he’s just as happy sleeping on the couch and banging Charlie’s mom.
Speaking of Charlie’s mom, Bonnie Kelly is back! Brought in by the crew as someone they can control, she becomes a surprise third finalist in The Golden Bachelor—just in time for the Fantasy Suites. Rather than choosing the order, Frank tries to talk Jesse into a foursome, perhaps even a fivesome if he wants to join as long as he doesn’t make eye contact.
And then DeVito and Kane get one of their best scenes. Kane plays it totally straight as she tells Frank about how she shortened her name from Samantha to Sam to satisfy strangers so they wouldn’t have to use as many syllables. She’s spent too much of her life pleasing other people while Frank has lived his life exactly as he wanted. “It’s never too late to find your heart and your voice and your name,” she says. It’s moving
Of course, Frank dumps her with a note that says “Dunzo.”
After a rushed bit about the group setting off an “Elephant Toothpaste Bomb” in the mansion that ends up in them turning into green goblins when Charlie puts Nair in the concoction, Frank is basically left to make his final choice alone. Should he go with his slutty history with Bonnie or the hot young chewer?
Neither! Frank jumps into the limo and reaches Sam at the bus station while Willie Nelson’s great cover of “Always On My Mind” plays in the background. He was afraid. “Would you accept this rose and be my wife?” he asks. And the two kiss. And unlike pretty much every other time we’ve seen Frank make contact with a female, it’s not gross.
It’s a tender in-universe moment followed by a moving tribute to Lynne Marie Stewart, who played Bonnie Kelly. Stewart passed in February, and it’s worth noting that her episodes of Sunny were just a part of her legacy. She was a member of The Groundlings in the ’70s, working with both Paul Reubens and Phil Hartman there. And, of course, she played Miss Yvonne on Pee-wee’s Playhouse.
Goodbye to “the Most Beautiful Woman in Puppetland.” You will be missed.
Stray observations
- • What a strong season, with several highlights and only a few below-average episodes. (The dog-track one ran out of steam.)
- • An Elephant Toothpaste Explosion is a real thing. Read about it and plan your attack.
- • If you missed it, go check out Kane’s recent turn in Between The Temples. She gives one of the best performances of her career.
- • There are several great asides in this episode. Two of my faves are Charlie yelling “I don’t approve of this union” for no reason other than to get a TV catch phrase and the Dee bird joke that ends with “wetting our beaks.” Call me simple, but Dee bird jokes never get old.
