As part of their ongoing effort to publish at least 5 MTV-reality-show-related items a day, Us Weekly recently gave its readers the opportunity to win a date with…(wait for it)…Brody Jenner!

That's right: a date with a real, live marginal character on a "reality-based" spinoff of Laguna Beach who is not afraid to wear a T-shirt boldly proclaiming his preference for the possessions of "Bro" before the possessions of "Ho"!

Not only that, but in addition to the opportunity to get close to someone who occupies the same elevated realm as those two blonde girls and the brunette, the winner of the contest evidently also gets to star in their own awkward video on UsWeekly.com–a fact that makes the winner at least as famous as Brody Jenner!

Below you'll find that video, complete with thought bubbles, excited yelping, lots of pink, and the saddest "Oh my God!" on record:

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