Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Get your whites even whiter with White Collar

Illustration for article titled Get your whites even whiter with White Collar

Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Thursday, December 19. All times are Eastern.


White Collar (USA, 9 p.m.): It's a wasteland on TV tonight, with one lone holdout: White Collar, that spunky show with Matt Bomer as a con-man turned consultant! This drama is doing its fall finale tonight, even though everyone else did theirs last week; USA just has to like, buck the trend, man. Kenny Herzog has been plugging away at the reviews for this drama even though we haven't called much attention to it. This fifth season has been good, but not spectacular; in tonight's "No Good Deed," Peter investigates a case in which Neal is the guilty party. Oh, grand larceny! You're so much lovelier than petty larceny.

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (11 a.m.): Zack Handlen’s Outer-Space Fictional-Station Support Group will be meeting at the usual time, in the usual location—for another single-episode review. This time, it's “In The Pale Moonlight.”

Charlie Brown Christmas (ABC, 8 p.m.): The gang puts on a holiday pageant as Charlie Brown whines about commercialism. Ugh, Charlie Brown! No one cares!!

The Year (ABC, 9 p.m.): 20/20 hosts a special on the stuff that happened this year. Includes segment on the birth of Prince George, the Boston Marathon bombing, and the trial of George Zimmerman. Robin Roberts hosts.

The X Factor (Fox, 8 p.m.): A winner is crowned on tonight's finale of The X Factor! Real talk: We could not tell you the difference between The Voice and The X Factor if we tried.


Anger Management (FX, 9:30 p.m.): This abomination of a television show is featuring an episode titled “Charlie And The Christmas Hooker.” Charlie Sheen has really grown, hasn't he?

The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie (Nickelodeon, 7 p.m.): A pair of pants made of sponge and a Bob in the shape of a square go on an adventure together. Features a cameo by David Hasselhoff.


Die Another Day (Style, 8 p.m.): The last Pierce Brosnan James Bond movie features Halle Berry, Madonna, and Rosamund Pike as Bond girls. Also, North Korea, and diamonds. In retrospect, it's not a very good movie.

College Basketball: Duke vs. UCLA (ESPN, 8 p.m.): These two teams will be going head-to-head in New York City, for the 2013 Holiday Hoops tournament, hosted by Kay Jewelers. Every kiss begins with TECHNICAL FOUL! And with that, I'm going to Jared.


Key & Peele: Last night, Key & Peele closed out its third season with an episode that introduced a Mr. Mahina and something terrifying called chain wax. Brandon Nowalk was on the scene to sort out the matter.