Party boy Donald throws paper towels to disaster victims
If there’s anything President Donald Trump knows, it’s how to find the silver lining in horrendous situations that are made worse through his own failings. His visit to Puerto Rico has been full of stately proclamations on how the natural disaster his administration seems unable to handle is upsetting his budget (ha ha!) and hasn’t caused nearly enough death to be so upset about (an interesting point!).
Now, perhaps understanding that his sage wisdom and very hilarious jokes aren’t enough to ease the suffering of the millions in need of food, water, and electricity, the Trumpster is using a new tactic in his fight to help the people of Puerto Rico: getting the dang party started.
Here’s the man himself, knowing that a ceremonial distribution of supplies doesn’t need to be solemn and choosing instead to toss out paper towels to a church gathering in Guaynabo like your boss sinking garbage-bin free throws on casual Friday.
And again, working the crowd some more by making sure those around him remember to cheer up and enjoy themselves a little. After all, what is a president but the host of that great big cocktail party we call a nation?