Our gentlest minions, we have some very exciting news for you. The acclaimed filmmaker and movie-lover known for popularizing extremely niche genres, actors, directors, and tired jokes about feet, Quentin Tarantino has begun passing on the finest of cinematic delights to the next generation. According to a recent interview with Empire, Tarantino’s two-year-old son has seen one movie. Was it Sister Street Fighter? How about Tony Scott’s Renegade? The Great Waldo Pepper? Nope. No. Sorry. The kid has only seen Despicable Me 2. So the only question now is, does he need to see another movie?
“[My son is] pretty young, so he’s only really seen one movie,” Tarantino told Empire. “I thought I was hitting a Minions cartoon, and I realize it’s Despicable Me 2. And he seemed to be interested in the opening credits, so I go, ‘Okay, I guess we’re watching Despicable Me 2. He gets up and he walks behind the couch, but he’s still watching the TV. We watched it for 20 minutes, until it was time for him to go to the park, and then the next day we watched another 15 minutes of it. And so, in the course of a week, in small bites, the first movie Leo ever watched was Despicable Me 2.”
The revelation of a child enjoying the Minions puts to rest years of criticism that the Minions are only for teenage boys in suits and moms on Facebook. So, Gentleminions of the world, we implore you: Take young Leo Tarantino under your H&M blazers and train him in the ways of Gru—at least until we get a screening of Despicable Me 3 at the New Beverly.
Now, we know this isn’t news that most care about. It might not even be worth the publication of this article. Nevertheless, millions of people paid hard-earned money last weekend to make Minions: The Rise Of Gru a cultural inflection point. The scene was chaos as innocent teens, hoping to bring some style and finesse to the movies by emulating their prophet Nicole Kidman, were shut out in the cold for wearing ties to the cineplex. It seems as though some theater owners might be tired of Stuart, Kevin, and Bob saying “ba-na-na.” Well, Tarantino’s kid isn’t, so back off!
What else is Tarantino’s kid into? Friggin’ Peppa Pig, duh. And if you’re interested, the Pulp Fiction director thinks “Peppa Pig is the greatest British import of this decade.” Damn. At this time, we’d like to send our deepest condolences to fans of Fleabag and Downton Abbey: A New Era.