Robo-copping, short-circuiting case file #62: Chappie
My World Of Flops is Nathan Rabin’s survey of books, television shows, musical releases, or other forms of entertainment that were financial flops, critical failures, or lack a substantial cult following.
The 2009 surprise hit District 9 established South African writer-director Neill Blomkamp as a quintessential science-fiction filmmaker of ideas. Those ideas weren’t necessarily dazzling in their originality. District 9 wasn’t subtle about the way it employed the largely class-based conflict between recent alien arrivals and human beings who treat their new neighbors with shocking callousness to comment on the cruelty and dehumanizing aspects of South Africa’s apartheid past.
Blomkamp’s film seemingly came out of nowhere to become a huge international blockbuster. It was even a long-shot nominee for Best Picture, albeit one with only a slightly better chance of winning than movies that weren’t nominated. Blomkamp’s follow-up, 2013’s Elysium, cemented his reputation as a filmmaker as enraptured by provocative ideas and social commentary as he is by spectacle and action. The movie also suggested that Blomkamp had an unfortunate tendency to let the magnitude of his ideas outstrip his ability to realize them. To put things in George Lucas terms, he went from creating Han Solo and the gang to unleashing Jar Jar Binks upon the world in record time. And Blomkamp’s Jar Jar Binks is a similarly silly-talking man-child of the robotic persuasion, who goes by the name of Chappie.
If Elysium made a lot of folks feel a little iffy about Blomkamp as a filmmaker, then last year’s Chappie made them wonder if they’d been egregiously wrong about him all along. It’s a film so off that it calls the filmmaker’s entire oeuvre into question, a movie so dodgy it caused me to retroactively like District 9 less. Chappie broadcast its egregious awfulness for months before its release. It was the subject of feverish anticipation by bad-movie lovers wondering if it could possibly be as terrible and misguided as it appeared.
Everything about the movie promised a train wreck, from its irritatingly cheerful title; to its bizarre fusion of Short Circuit, Flight Of The Navigator, and RoboCop; to its casting of South African rap duo Die Antwoord members Ninja and Yolandi Visser as desperate criminals in the near future named, respectively, Ninja and Yolandi Visser. Only Blomkamp knows why he decided to make the film’s primary villain, a robotics and weapons designer played by Hugh Jackman, look like an unusually hirsute session musician for early ’80s yacht rock bands. On a follicular level alone, Chappie is a goddamned mess. I haven’t seen such squalor or so many inconceivably awful, semi-mullet hairstyles since my last visit to The Gathering Of The Juggalos.
Considering how lazily derivative our culture has become, it takes an awful lot to get called out for being unoriginal. The culture-wide eye-roll that greeted a movie about a sentient robot with an irresistible child-like spirit was likely rooted in the shamelessness and incompetence of the stealing. If Blomkamp was going to make a movie about robot cops, why not just call it RoboCop? Maybe because RoboCop was remade the year before, although you could certainly be forgiven for forgetting the new RoboCop exists. Everyone else has.
Chappie opens, bewilderingly enough, with a pair of talking heads discussing the film’s controversial robot technology as if in a documentary or mockumentary. Then Anderson Cooper appears as himself and delivers the following avalanche of exposition:
Johannesburg, South Africa became the focus of the world in 2016 with the deployment of the planet’s first all-robotic police units. Crime levels plummeted and [weapons contractor] Tetra Vaal’s stock skyrocketed. The biggest fear the population expressed was vulnerability to hacking. Tetra Vaal assures this is not something to worry about, with their bulletproof guard key system, a system that allows them, and only them, to update software on the robots.
Before the success of the ubiquitous human-sized police robots, there was a bigger bad boy on the block: The Moose. Vincent Moore [Hugh Jackman] is a weapon designer and a former soldier. He has a fundamental spiritual issue with artificial intelligence. The Hyper-Van’s Neural transmitter converts the human operator’s thoughts into the robot’s actions, a departure from the artificial intelligence that governs the scouts. Now, with interest coming from the U.S., China, and North Korea, the scout’s creator, Deon Wilson, sees a rich future.