Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Finally: A Killer Tire Movie

Everything both animate and inanimate, both sentient and non-sentient will one day rise up and kill us—birds, dolls, adorable pets you buy from mysterious shops in the gothic section of Chinatown, cars, water, snowmen, trees or whatever, ski lifts, robots, orphans, etc. The only thing we can do is make movies about the oncoming object/animal/orphan insurgencies in the hope of warning humanity-at-large about the threats posed by these seemingly benign things.

The latest of these horror movie/warnings is Rubber, a movie by Quentin Dupieux about a murderous tire. You'll never be fooled by those innocent-looking Firestones again.

Illustration for article titled Finally: A Killer Tire Movie

From TwitchFilm:

A group of spectators is watching a mock-projection in the middle of the desert. They make comments on the scenes of the "film" as it is occurring before their eyes: Robert, a tire that has been abandoned in the desert, suddenly comes to life, for no reason. He learns how to get around, explores the desert and discovers in himself a passion for destroying insects and various lost items. Robert soon develops a telepathic gift, which gives him the ability to destroy anything he wants, without moving…

Robert The Tire comes to life and turns into a killer "for no reason"? But there is a reason: he was abandoned in the desert. Robert The Tire never had parents who loved him and filled him with air. He probably never had a normal life on a car or in a garage. Instead he was thrown out into the desert to fend for himself at a young age. After years of melting away alone in the hot desert sun with no structure or positive tire models of any kind, it's understandable that Robert The Tire would all of a sudden come to life and lash out against a world that never cared for him. Rubber is, at its core, a cautionary tale about the way we treat our tires.

Or it's horror movie about a tire that goes nuts and kills everything for no reason. Either way: Killer tire movie!

Now we just need movies about killer sunglasses, killer cereal bowls, killer tatami mats, killer Party Of Five: The Complete Series DVDs, killer beach umbrellas, killer piglets, and killer everything else in the world, and we'll be ready.