The Righteous Gemstones conjures such an unconventional mix of tones that it can turn comedy into horror with a simple shot or sound cue. One minute, BJ’s crying in the tub; the next, a mystical and mysterious Monchhchi is serving his wife sparkling water. More than most comedies that fancy themselves dramas, The Righteous Gemstones dips into the uncanny in service of laughs, positioning the tacky wealth porn against a haunting score or oblique, canted angles. It’s melodramatic and soap operatic but with a palpable, eerie danger. “You Shall Remember” heightens these nightmarish qualities. Throughout this plot-focused, transitional episode, the Gemstones find themselves under attack from the most usual of suspects: themselves—and the guy whose church they firebombed.
Vance Simkins is fuming. From the remains of his mini-mall church to his desolate corporate headquarters, Vance’s empire crumbles as the Gemstones’ grows. His family fractured at the hands of his rivals, and his brother Craig (Gogo Lomo-David) only visits to collect the inheritance his brother is squandering on his quest to earn the Gemstones’ respect. Lomo-David seasons the hell out of his reading of “they will never respect you,” but it’s when his character questions Vance’s sexuality that he hits a nerve. Vance returns with a slap that fuels his all-out assault on the Gemstones. Whether he’s driven by bigoted beliefs or self-hatred does not matter. Kelvin is the one taking the fall.
Kelvin and Keefe were one of the show’s riskiest gambles. The series was more than happy to play up this deeply closeted youth pastor through bizarre stereotypes with two heterosexual actors at the helm. It speaks to their sincerity and success as performers that neither Adam DeVine nor Tony Cavalero inspired much, if any, controversy. Perhaps they’re just too cute—though Keefe’s little Kelvin chant might rank among his creepiest moments. “You Shall Remember” deepens the relationship by finally forcing Kelvin out of the Gemstone bubble, where he’s more vulnerable than he knows.
Kelvin is doing a victory lap before he Joe Bidens the Top Christ Following Man Of The Year roundtable debate. Prism converted a new paying audience who liked the Bible without the problematic bits, and Kelvin revels in the spotlight, rubbing his success in Jesse and Judy’s faces at every possible opportunity. Even Daddy had to give him props. Kelvin is far too successful for Jesse’s Leadership Team’s presentations about Lori’s cute earrings. He has more important matters, namely a new and improved treehouse, an ever-expanding safe space for him to run to when the world is too mean.
But somebody’s got to get hurt, and success gets the better of Kelvin. After the siblings give Eli an ultimatum—the kids or Lori—Jesse gives his little brother some tough love, telling him that everyone can see he’s full of himself and also “San Fransisco.” Jesse explains that his nomination isn’t validation. It’s tokenism. His nomination is pinkwashing for the Top Christ Following Man governing body, which wants to look modern and inclusive. But Kelvin, high on the smell of his own farts, can give as good as he can get and goes in for the kill. He tells Jesse he’s a loser whose kids don’t respect him and that Judy is a burden on the family. Unfortunately, Kelvin won’t be able to escape that criticism so easily.
Just as he can shrug off responsibility for Kelvin’s retaliation, Jesse shrugs off burning down Vance’s church. At the Cape & Pistol, Vance confronts Jesse over the apparent and dangerous overreaction. Despite Vance being rightfully upset over this, Jesse delights in disregarding him, making Craig’s words earlier ring true. Jesse plays “Quit Hitting Yourself” with Vance, revealing Vance’s desire to be seen by the Gemstones as an equal. Few can channel their inner 12-year-old like Danny McBride, and his “new phone, who dis?” routine works beautifully off the humorless Vance (as does Jesse’s impression of the member who accused him of not reading the updated bylaws). Name-calling and arson won’t win this war, though. At the Top Christ Following roundtable, Vance reestablishes himself and his ministry as a home for the “traditional” values American Christians crave. He kills Kelvin in the first question, leaving the youngest Gemstone a twitchy mess of flop sweat and feathers. Jesse isn’t likely to forget him now.
“You Shall Remember” primes the pump on Kelvin by trying to keep a threatening undercurrent throughout the numerous plotlines as it finds ways to advance them. Jesse’s Team uncovers evidence that Miss Lori might be a Black Widow after doing some ace Instagram detective work. Still, though they weren’t able to verify “Big Dick” Mitch’s nickname, they found Lori has a penchant for dating men who end up dead or missing. When they confront Baby Billy, who withholds the information until they green light Teenjus, he tells them that Lori is broke, which feels like information we had already. The kids are satisfied, but a quick, lingering shot of Corey and Lori’s final line of the night complicates things.
It’s hard to know how we’re supposed to feel about Lori or whether we should trust her. But the show frequently introduces elements that don’t fit neatly in the world. For example, BJ made a new friend this week: a helper monkey named Dr. Watson. Early in the night, Amber and her statement necklace arrive at Casa De Judy to deliver the monkey as Judy takes out the trash for maybe the first time in her life. Amber runs a non-profit that pairs veterans with service animals because of course she does, and the money comes with an ominous musical theme of ghostly organ grinders, making Dr. Watson’s trip to the fridge to get a Surf Citrus Yuzu Smash White Claw as unsettling as it is rad as hell. As always, Baltz thrives in situations that allow him to mix cliché melodrama with brutal physical comedy, and after falling into the tub, BJ and Watson push this inspirational movie of the week into abject eeriness.
Director Jody Hill makes the adorable Dr. Watson a suspicious agent in the episode when he cuts to reaction shots of Watson observing BJ in his natural habitat. Throughout the night, he helps the mix of tones feel consistent, bouncing from Baby Billy’s fast-tracked version of The Chosen to the sordid tales of Dr. Watson with ease. Though “You Shall Remember” may be a touch forgettable as it transitions from the first half of the season into the second, doubling back to Vance to give Kelvin some conflict, it nevertheless delivers enough oddness and distinctive comedy to keep it feeling like every other show about rich idiots. God really does have the Gemstones’ backs.
Stray observations
- • Sunday School: Tonight’s title, “You Shall Remember,” is from Deuteronomy 8:18. “And you shall remember the Lord your God, for it is He who gives you power to get wealth, that He may establish His covenant which He swore to your fathers, as it is this day.” This is all about Vance—evoking his battle with Jesse at the Cape & Pistol and his insistence on tradition and scripture over Prism’s abridged Bible.
- • Sola (Kerstin Schulze) watches teen dramas like Pretty Little Liars and would watch Teenjus.
- • We didn’t spend much time with Baby Billy tonight, but his scene with Aunt Tiffany by the pool was probably the sweetest the character has ever been. And it’s thanks to Valyn Hall, who, as Lori did last week, brings a grounded love to this Ric Flair of a man. The key to liking these characters is their spouses.
- • Baby Billy’s mouthing the lines as he directs Teenjus was divine. His version of The Chosen should be released in theaters, too.
