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A Minecraft Movie jams surrealism and clichés into the crafting grid

A mix of blatant formula and complete oddity, the film is a failed recipe with plenty of seasoning.

A Minecraft Movie jams surrealism and clichés into the crafting grid
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The power of Minecraft lies in its flexibility. Independent of its potential to create complex feats of architecture and computation, of its blocky graphics and ambient soundscape, is a platform. A stage. In Minecraft, a player can build just about anything. But Minecraft can also be just about anything. That’s why it remains such a powerful setting for people to prop up their own stories, their own personalities, years after it was a backdrop for some of the world’s biggest streamers to attract their followings. Much like Grand Theft Auto, it’s a game that serves its players, not the other way around. This means, when adapting it into a film, director Jared Hess and his posse of screenwriters had endless options. Maybe that potential is what the indefinite article in the title of A Minecraft Movie refers to. But this Minecraft Movie doesn’t tap into a vein of imagination. Instead, it resembles someone’s first in-game creation: Dime-a-dozen parts, flavored with personal eccentricities, assembled with a child’s disregard. From these ingredients springs a movie that’s both annoyingly predictable and perhaps the most erratic live-action video game adaptation since the original Super Mario Bros. film went to Dinohattan.

While Minecraft offered its adapters the ability to come up with any plot, its half-dozen credited writers decided to go with every plot. A Minecraft Movie isn’t just the familiar tale of a man-child learning to move on from his past, or the familiar tale of a kid whose adventure in a video game world validates and nurtures the very creativity that’s isolating him from his peers. It’s also not just a story of a different man-child who got stuck inside a game, nor is it just the story of that man-child teaming up with some fish out of water in order to save both the game world and the real world from a host of greedy fantasy baddies led by a pig-witch. A Minecraft Movie is all of those mutually unintelligible ideas and more, stacked on top of each other, mismatched block by mismatched block, until—after 100 minutes of convention and chaos—it finally abandons the construction of its pixelated Tower of Babel.

It’s impressive how arbitrarily the film’s often indecipherable plot threads are woven together, and how breezily the film rushes through its tropes. In the opening minutes, extensive voiceover introduces young wannabe miner Steve and old actual miner Steve (Jack Black). Steve goes from the real world to the Minecraft world; Steve encounters a world-threatening MacGuffin and disposes of that MacGuffin. Then the film goes through another introduction with another clownish big boy: Garrett “The Garbage Man” Garrison (Jason Momoa, wearing a pink fringed leather jacket and Pit Viper shades), riffing off of peaked-in-the-’80s pro gamers like Billy Mitchell. Then the film does this process again with this town’s new kid at school, Henry (Sebastian Hansen), and his older sister Natalie (Emma Myers), who now serves as his guardian after their mom’s death. This latter point is barely mentioned, a lingering tragic backstory remnant from another version of this movie. Also the siblings’ realtor, Dawn (Danielle Brooks), is around, though she feels as if she’s been hastily added in after the fact using movie magic.

And yet, before this whiplash-inducing ensemble is inevitably sucked through a portal into Minecraft’s Overworld, A Minecraft Movie also takes the time to invoke some of Hess’ cinematic fixations: tacky clothes, an Idaho setting, tater tots, llamas, dry punchlines, nostalgic failures, and comedy fixtures like Jemaine Clement and Jennifer Coolidge. When a science experiment gone wrong results in the fiery demise of a local potato chip factory’s mascot, or when Coolidge’s extremely divorced character hits an escaped Minecraft villager with her car, the goofy lunacy made possible by this cinematic sandbox gleams like diamonds in a cave. But, in opposition to the film’s half-delivered moral about creativity, these flashes of personality are constantly buried by obligations to the film’s blockbuster structure.

As the film’s quest for a glowing orb (which is a cube) unfurls—as the man-children learn about themselves and friendship, as the women learn that they need something just off-screen for most of the movie, and as the actual child learns…something, one must imagine—A Minecraft Movie sends its characters through hokey gauntlets of frenetic chases and cushioned fights against zombies, Piglins, skeletons, and creepers. Though the design work often colorfully evokes the game, it’s put into scenes that could be from any children’s movie from the last 25 years.

Despite a few early moments of block placement and a few nods to crafting tables, this is mostly a run ‘n’ gun action-adventure peppered with explosions and pop song montages. Hess’ direction drains these hackneyed sequences of energy, and the choppy film poorly stitches them together. When the film slows down long enough to get a good look at its “realistic” character designs, pores and wrinkles assault the eyes. The villagers in particular look like Hannibal Lector wearing the fleshy face of Bert from Sesame Street. The lo-fi aesthetic of the game wasn’t ever going to make it onto the big screen, but—aside from a few scant moments of visual inventiveness—this generic approach simply makes A Minecraft Movie another piece of loosely affiliated merchandise. At least, every once in a while, the film rewards its audience with an enjoyable ditty from Jack Black.

Black’s Steve acts as the party’s guide through the game world, which mostly entails him acting as a Minecraft wiki, saying things from the game and pausing for applause. Black, whose gamer bonafides include streaming Minecraft with PewDiePie back in 2019 and having his own Let’s Play YouTube channel, is at least a competent vehicle for these references. And, whether it makes sense or not, the confident pitchman is the center of the movie. In fact, in its strangest moments, A Minecraft Movie can resemble a Japanese commercial for an unrelated product, in which Jack Black is the slumming American star. At any moment, the film could come to an end, with Black turning to the camera while holding a sweating can of chilled iced coffee.

This never quite happens, as Black is too busy fully unleashing his schtick upon this confused hero’s journey. An unkempt cannonball, Black bounces off the walls and slings slang as usual, looking like he wandered onto a late-night talk show stage to do a sketch about Minecraft rather than actually starring in a Minecraft movie. Supporting him, Momoa more deftly displays the cartoonishness he brought to Slumberland by being large and clueless. The bro-out chemistry between these two, and the stray silliness pulsing from the small moments with Coolidge or from some of the script’s deadpanned subversions, supply the fuel to this lurching collection of studio notes. No glowing cube-orbs or evil pig-witches or world-destroying portals or soul-sucking clichés can ever fully overpower two big goofy guys happy to be the butt of the joke.

Of course, one could question why this kids’ movie is led by two bearded men doing basically the same bit, rather than the actual kid who’s barely in the movie. One could rightfully question pretty much all of A Minecraft Movie, a formulaic template ornamented with surrealism. Some moments bear the scribbled signature of a filmmaker with offbeat passions. These are quickly plastered over by the hotel artwork of a four-quadrant IP extravaganza—and even the by-the-numbers sequences seem jumbled, out of order, or repeated. Yet, there’s something fitting about this film’s contradictions. Minecraft is fertile ground for innovation and exploitation. It’s adaptable, limited mostly by those playing it. One can build something personal, copy something mass produced, or attempt to tweak one with the other. Those behind A Minecraft Movie saw infinite possibilities laid out before them and—unlike another adaptation of a popular building pastime, The Lego Movie—opted for the one that’s been made a thousand times before.

Director: Jared Hess
Writer: Chris Bowman, Hubbel Palmer, Neil Widener, Gavin James, Chris Galletta
Starring: Jason Momoa, Jack Black, Emma Myers, Danielle Brooks, Sebastian Hansen, Jennifer Coolidge
Release Date: April 4, 2025

 
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