It's A Nice Day For A Wollipop Wedding
All couples can be, for lack of a better term, icky. This is why reading the Vows section of the New York Times can sometimes be more effective than ipecac. Most public displays of affection, like say weddings, straddle the line between sweet and saccharin-to-the-point-of-disgusting—but somehow reading about weddings obliterates the sweet side entirely until you're involuntarily making the kind of twisted grimace that comes from reading that two far-beyond-grown adults got married under a cotton-candy rainbow while wearing Hershey's wrappers. Seriously:
“I think she is still more beautiful than any other girl,” said Mr. Zornitsky, now 44 and the chief financial officer of Brownstone Asset Management, an investment firm in New York.
“I have loved David since I was 23,” Ms. Rosen said. “He makes me feel as lovely and youthful as I was in my 20s.” She added, gratefully, “Makes looking in the mirror” a lot easier.
On April 5, the couple was escorted by their three boys down an aisle lined with lollipop trees at Dylan’s Candy Bar in New York. The bride wore a borrowed dress made of candy wrappers that was designed for “Project Runway.” Rabbi Douglas Sagal then led them in their vows beneath a wedding canopy of giant Whirly Pops and candy-colored balloons.
Their 50 guests dined on peanut butter and jelly tarts and candy sushi (coconut rice, Swedish Fish and Fruit Roll-Ups) while the couple danced to “Sugar, Sugar.”
Why not "Candy Shop" or Lil Wayne's "Lollipop"? If you're going to have a candy-themed wedding, you should do something to cut the sweetness. Think of your guests.
You might be wondering what gumdrop fairy lead this couple down the marshmallow lovers' lane to their candyland nuptials. It's the classic story of boy meets girl, boy leaves girl, girl unenthusiastically marries someone else out of a sense of obligation, blah blah blah: